Hairspray and Serenity/Firefly

So yeah, I saw it on Monday, but I’m finally getting around to reviewing it…so sue me, sue me, what can ya do me?

Hairspray was a lot of fun to watch, although I think I enjoyed the national tour production I saw more mainly because of the cross-dressing Edna Turnblad. On stage was Mr. Bumpo from The Punisher (2004) and I enjoyed him far more than Mrs. Travolta. Everybody else was fantastic though. And I swear I’m not on a West Side Story recognition binge, but a portion of Big Blonde and Beautiful choreography had bits and pieces of “The Dance At The Gym” choreography (The Blues) and I was kind of giddy….stupid, I know, but yeah. I really enjoyed James Marsden, Zac Efron and Elijah Kelley. Amanda Bynes I was iffy about just because the stage Penny is a lot dumber and a lot funnier. I missed “In the Big Doll House”, but I accept the alterations made for the story. Christopher Walken is so inspiring….I love that he’s still a dancing fool at his age.

Nicest kids in town!


I love the universe that Joss Whedon and Tim Minear cooked up for Firefly/Serenity and as I was rewatching bits and pieces of the tv series/movie again, I started thinking about how much fun an MMORPG based on that universe would be. Of course, my imagination is far more fertile than anything I’ve seen the gaming companies pump out, but allow me some shallow dreaming.

  • 2 playable “sides” with
    different classes

    • Alliance
      • military posting with a career path to operative if wanted
      • government posting with a career path to parliament
    • Browncoats
      • foragers like Mal
      • middle-men like Badger
    • should there be a reaver class? no, just reaver enemies…something else to deal with
  • When: 2 choices
    • sometime during the rebellion
    • after the events of the movie
  • Dialogue options
    • I love The Curse of Monkey Island where you get to choose your dialogue. Something like that which would allow Joss Whedon to write like a million different lines and implement them…kind of like what Gabe talks about for the Penny Arcade video game.

But hey, what can you do but dream or start your own game company. [le sigh]

Kingdom Hearts 2

1000 heartless was easy at Level 32…I even got to level 33!

The game is fascinating! My only complaint is the seeming lack of…something in the worlds. My biggest complaint is the movies. They deviate just by bits and pieces from the original and it drives me nuts! I mean the voice acting is fine and almost spot on for the most part. But Pirates of the Caribbean, Lion King, Mulan…they all made me go watch the real movies because…well it must be because I’m anal-retentive or something, but I had to have that real experience…the other levels were fine because it’s more of an homage than a direct replaying of it. That’s what the problem is…they’re trying to duplicate the movie line for line and they’re failing, but the game overall succeeds by using the characters and letting you interact with them in a new story. That is the key. For instance, when I first entered the Lion King level, I was stoked by the transformation. But when Scar starts doing his speech and it’s just totally screwed up delivery-wise, I nearly lost it!

Lights Camera Action

I just saw Rent for the first time in my life…even though I already knew the story and all the lyrics. See the summer before 9th grade (1999), I participated in two productions with Musical Youth Artist Repertory Theatre, aka MYART. I got involved with the group because the director/producer taught drama at my middle school. The two shows I did (The King and I, Annie) were my first real introduction into the world of musical theatre. Yeah there was that thing in 97 where the entire family did a production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, but that doesn’t really count because I was in the kid’s chorus. So here I am this freshman punk hanging out with a bunch of high school kids…and what was a big phenomenon in 99 for musical theatre high school rebels? That’s right…Sweeny Todd. No you idiot, it was Rent. So we all listened to the soundtrack non-stop. Which means I knew the story and the lyrics by heart. Now all I had to do was see the show. The national tour had stopped by OCPAC in 98, when I had no idea what it was. So when a special engagement showed up in 2000 I was dying to see it. Unfortunately, my parents saw it first and hated it. Their big complaint was the show’s glorification of homosexuality (Angel). So my mom completely blocks my ability to see it (which basically means I’m screwed for the next 3 years. Luckily it didn’t come back to So Cal (that I know of) until December 2003 (how the hell do I validate this) at the Grove of Anaheim. Being the lazy ass I am, I didn’t get around to reserving a ticket, which meant that I missed my chance to see it (I had turned 18 that summer). So then it came back as a special engagement at OCPAaC. My dad picked up a ticket for me (he knew that I wanted to see it and he wasn’t going to stop me) and I somehow wound up with a seat four rows from the stage and just left of center. Once I figured that out (I didn’t even look at my ticket until I was in the theatre) I was like, “Cool.” The stage setup is visible the whole time (i.e. no curtain) so you get a chance to watch the 4-piece band (synth, drums, bass and guitar) tune up and do little riffs for the audience. The show started when Roger walked onstage. But I didn’t know he was Roger…I though he was the lead guitarist…oops. The show unfolded the way an old Playboy* does and I settled in for an enjoyable time. One big thing I noticed was the cutural clash that occurred during the show. It’s a real modern rock opera (not Jesus Christ Superstar) so there was lots of cheering and applause. This would have pissed the old me off, but I understood the cultural clash at a very intimate level…because I’ve now been on both sides. Back in August I went to the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion to see A Little Night Music. While operatic, this Sondheim show has a lot more comedy than the LA Opera season ticket holders were used too…so my dad and I got lots of dirty looks as we enjoyed ourselves. So now here I am at Rent and all around me are college age kids who LOVE this show and they’re hooting and hollering and mooing…and I find myself joining in…at the most appropriate moments of course. But that is just one of the side notes. The only real added experience I got from actually seeing the show was A) noticing any audible screw-ups to the songs (cause it’s what I really know) B) seeing the staging/choreography and C) seeing how the show progresses as a unit instead of as a series of songs.

My conclusion: yeah it glorifies homosexuals, but I enjoyed the passion with which the performance was mounted which is what really matters.

*Not that I know how a Playboy unfolds. I can’t even get the darn thing open. Aw shucks!

 

 

 

I’m not a dedicated gamer, but when I do play games I try to have fun. I picked up Doom3 because I had heard amazing things about it’s graphics. They were right. John Carmack has outdone himself with this game’s engine. It’s absolutely amazing. Running around as a marine on Mars with a flashlight and a pistol is lots of fun. But then all hell breaks loose…literally. So now I have to fend off hordes of zombie-fied marines and scientists…in the dark. Because not only was the mars station under construction and poorly funded, but hell breaking loose broke about 3/4 of the working lights. Now this wouldn’t be a problem if basic marine equipment included night-vision goggles. But you do have a flashlight. And a pistol. So I’m wandering around in the dark watching my very realistic flashlight highlight the detailed walls…watching dust particles float through the beam. Suddenly a hell-beast jumps out at me. He starts shooting energy blasts at me. So I switch from my flashlight to my pistol. But where’s the hell-beast? I can’t see him! So I switch to my flashlight. There he is! I switch to my pistol and he disappears again. Meanwhile his energy blasts are nailing my armor and health ratings. It is so incredibly irritating. I mean, I watch 24 and cop shows and love watching trained soldiers charge into darkened rooms with their right hand holding the gun and the left hand supporting the right holding a flashlight to illuminate any targets. So now I’m screwing around with the console to try and deactivate all shadows or turn on all the lights. You know, come to think about it, the flashlight in one hand would only work with the pistol (the rest of the guns just have to be two handed), and that would be kind of difficult to program. PC Gamer told me about a flashlight mod that gives me the flashlight for the first 3 major weapons (displays the flashlight beam without the actual light source (nicknamed the Duct Tape Mod)), but I just can’t stand playing the game anymore. The sound engineering is so bloody brilliant that it scares the pants of me before I get a chance to shoot anything…oh yeah and the mod rebooted all my save games. that will turn me off just about any video game…ah the price of modding…

I originally thought that Sky Captain would take place in the 50′s because of the iron giants in the trailer. So it confused me what actually happened in the movie but never enough to bother me or ruin it (the ending took care of that). I’m a big fan of the 50′s. Partly because of the movie The Iron Giant because it was a very period piece. I’m basically a big fan of the past, even with all the sordid things that happened (Salem Witch Trials/McCarthy-ism, Nazi’s, the Holocaust) because of the positive things that occurred. Or more correctly, the amusing things that occurred. Of course the 50′s was the beginning of Walt Disney’s greatest legacy Disneyland, but it was also home to the Coonskin Cap Craze. Well, yeah it’s another Disney thing, but it was really a big deal back then. It was also the era right after the bomb was dropped on Japan, which led to an intense period of arms building, each country trying to beat the others to the latest and greatest death machines. In America, this was portrayed to the public in an almost comical sense as the government advised all people under threat of nuclear attack to duck and cover beneath their desks. Then there’s the whole thing about people building bomb shelters in their basements. If you really want the 411 (albeit an incredibly abbreviated 411) on this era that I love, check out Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start The Fire.” Some have theorized that he wrote the song after a little boy commented that nothing happened in his parent’s youth, but who knows why multi-million dollar artists drunk drive into inanimate objects? I mean do the things they do. Hee hee. But it’s a great patter song listing the great people, events and places of the 40s-80s. Pretty good listening if I do say so myself.

 

Part Deaux

For you newbie’s who skipped part alpha and went straight here to part deaux (whatever the hell that means) the following are my vitals. I’m a 17 year old Christian white guy born on July 1. I’ve been dating my girlfriend for about two years. She is a freshman in college and a dancer. I am an Eagle Boy Scout (the highest honor they give out). I’ve had my license since February 3rd, which means I’m not allowed to transport any persons younger than 25 without a 25 year old licensed in’duh’vidual* in the vehicle until I turn 18 this summer. Oh well. I am a senior at Orange County High School of the Arts, a charter school in Santa Ana. I am a musical theatre major which means that I sing songs, act…um…actions, and dance dances. I’m glad that made sense.

Another fun fact is that last August I paid a doctor to cut out the crack of my ass and sew it back up. Not that I had a choice in the matter, for you see I was afflicted by a rare genetic disease that formed these “pits” in my crack and growth of hair in my crack would be forced into the “pits” and cause infection, so I had to have it removed. That was certainly fun. If you really want any other juicy tidbits, you’ll have to read part alpha.

I love comic books. I’m also surprised that I never mentioned my love of comic books before. See, it all started when I walked into a Sav-on in Yosemite and picked up FLASH #138, the conclusion of the 3-part story Human Race. Ever since then I have slowly but surely increased my comic wares, expanding my sights to such lovely titles as GREEN LANTERN (GO KYLE!), GREEN ARROW (Yea, Kevin Smith!), AQUAMAN (post-Obsidian Age), SPECTRE (the fate of Hal Jordan, former Green Lantern), DEADMAN (he’s a dead guy that can posses others, what’s not to love), JLA (Obsidian Age Crisis and beyond), BATMAN: GOTHAM KNIGHTS (just to find out if Bane is Bruce Wayne’s illegitimate brother), and BATMAN (just for the HUSH storyline by Jim Lee and Jeph Loeb). However, my favorite comic is FLASH, with GREEN LANTERN my 2nd favorite and JLA my 3rd. FLASH is the story of Wally West who, as a teenager, was accidentally bathed in electrified chemicals and granted the power of super speed. He has since gone to “heaven” and back in the TERMINAL VELOCITY storyline (by Mark Waid the ultimate comic book writer) and all for love. That’s what’s great about this series…it’s a love story between Wally West and his now wife (the marriage took almost 12 episodes because she was pulled out of the time-stream and erased from everyone’s memories by one of the Flash’s many enemies, nicknamed ROGUES) Linda Park.

Besides comics, I also love the Game Boy Advance game series (there be two of them now) Golden Sun. This innovative RPG tells the fantastical story of a wayward world called Weyward (yes I planned the irony of that sentence) where Alchemy is a golden power that has been locked away and is now destroying the world. In the first game, you battle against those trying to unlock alchemy, and you fail. Then in the second game you learn the imminent threat of destruction and strive to unlock alchemy. It is incredibly well orchestrated and played. Buy it now. Just kidding.

The other thing I do besides play video games and read comic books is read books. Series I enjoy include Left Behind by LaHaye and Jenkins; Animorphs by K.A. Applegate; Harry Potter by J.K. Rowling; Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer; Chuck Palahniuk (who wrote Fight Club, which gets a 10 out of 10 on my Book-to-Movie transfer scale, which includes flops [relatively speaking] like Dreamcatcher [ooh, I'll explain that one in a minute] and home runs like Lord of the Rings), and anything by Tom Clancy, John Grisham or Michael Crichton.

Here’s my thing with Dreamcatcher. I had yet to even think of Stephen King as an interesting author for he only wrote horror books, which can’t scare you like horror films where things go . . . . PAGH***! You know? Well then I saw the trailer for the movie version of Dreamcatcher and was instantly intrigued. So I asked my dad to pick up the book for me. I absorbed the book the way plants absorb sunlight. It was fantastic. After finishing the book, there was a letter from the author that said that book was therapeutic for King because he wrote it while he was recovering from his accident (you know, the one where a drunk driver hit him in plain daylight [or something of that nature]). The book, coupled with this note, made me feel great. Every word conveyed to me the healing energies that flowed through King. With this in mind I eagerly attended a viewing of the movie . . . and was eagerly turned off. It was a straight horror flick, complete with jumps, and completely without any of the therapeutic energies. This Pissed me OFF!! It did have some great actors, including one of my favs, Timothy Olyphant****, along with wonderful Morgan Freeman and Tom Sizemore. Nifty special efx, but again, that wasn’t what I was there for.

Getting back to books, I also read any random authors I become enticed by. These have included: Gregory Maguire’s “Wicked”, David Klass’s “You Don’t Know Me”, and Kurt Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse Five and Cat’s Cradle (this one actually brought about by Al Pacino and “The Recruit” with Colin Farrell [I loved "Phone Booth", yea for an old Hitchcock plot]). I also order from those silly Scholastic Book Order forms that your elementary teachers handed out, but not very often. This got me even more books to read. I read at a frightening pace and you should be very scared. Just kidding! Well, I think that this just about wraps up this chapter’s insanity. Stay tuned for the next one . . . in a couple of years! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Sorry.

*Hallelujah for Scott Adams, DNRC**, and Dilbert.

**Dogbert’s New Ruling Class – No Idiots Allowed

*** That’s a Klingon curse word. I don’t know what it means. I don’t speak Klingon.

****Catch Timmy as Hollywood Jack in Vin Diesel’s cop drama “A Man Apart”